i hope my kisses made it there.

the sun starts to set, i start to smile. which made me a different kind of happy, it's normally the other way around. vise versa. repeat. repeat. i breathe and live off of the sun, but not tonight, not now. the wind's picking up outside, it brushes a crossed and i can feel it, pushing my hair into my face. i push it back away. i light up the dark sky with the smile you put on my face. it felt warm. i threw all of me into the wind tonight, i stood outside and i said your name. i smiled and i spun around like i was the only one alive. i crossed my fingers and wished that everyone inside could see me, i didn't want to hide the happy i was wearing. i let it all go. i threw my past into my past and looked to the sky for what's in store for me. you have a hold of me. i pulled my hands to my mouth and took a deep breath, i threw them up and closed my eyes. i hope my kisses made it there. i let them find their own way this time. i know they will. not a single road map, no compasses. no direction, into the wind with out any senses. i threw them up into the starless sky. i couldn't see them, not tonight, with every rain drop falling onto my face, your kisses landed on my lips and i found a way to feel you. i'm a few hundred miles away, and i found a way to feel you. you're a thousand kinds of beautiful. i wish i could find just one word. i wish i could pull out every beautiful thing i have ever written and say they were all about you, but i can't so i won't. i'll just keep on writing, spilling the tiny thoughts that float through my head. and when the day comes, i can reach out and brush my fingers a crossed your face, i'll stand in front of you saying " i give you the world." i'll throw my hands up to the sky and embrace what stands just a few inches taller than myself. with eyes deeper than i thought were ever possible. a complextion so soft. i am perplexed but in dispair. completely baffled and seperated from what was, and what still is. i found myself again tonight, but in a different sense, than when others set out to find who they are. i found myself, only wishing i was where ever you were. wrapped up in your smile and hiding behind nothing but your eyes. i want to know everything about you. every stich inside you. every thought that wanders and i want to feel every beat of that god forsaken, beautiful heart. i don't know how we got here, i'm faithless and that's okay. but whom ever and how ever, for you, i believe i was made.

thank you for bringing me back to life, thank you for resurfacing my heart.